


Battlefield

by Red0313



Category: The X-Files
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:41:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26358889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Red0313/pseuds/Red0313
Summary: A prompt from a friend on one of my favorite Facebook groups. Scully and Mulder have to share a hotel room. There is also an argument between the two.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 28





	Battlefield

They were in California on a case, by the beach. Santa Monica, to be exact. Normally, this would excite Scully. But, the whole day had been shit. It was one thing after the other. 

First, they lost her luggage. It took two hours to locate. How do you lose someone’s luggage? She was more than patient. But then...

Then, their car rental had a marginal air conditioning unit. Fine. Mulder shrugged and Scully wasn’t going to get angry. She breathed deeply and relaxed. 

She liked to live by the five by five rule. If it wasn’t going to matter in five years, don’t spend more than five minutes mad about it. 

She didn’t realize how many times she would have to live by that rule today.

When they arrived at the police station, they couldn’t find close parking, and it was unbearably hot. Honestly, did she light an orphanage on fire recently and forget? 

“Hi ya, folks. Welcome to Santa Monica,” the guy threw his hand out, offering a hand shake. She already didn’t like him. “I’m Sheriff Bishop.”

He was in his mid forties, beer gut, and you could smell the coffee coming from his breath, with a serious receding hair line. 

“Agent Mulder, I didn’t know you were bringing your wife. Miss, there’s a shopping center around the block, if you want to do a little shopping while we go to the crime scene.” 

Mulder almost felt sorry for the guy. Almost. 

“Actually, I am Agent Mulders partner. Special Agent Dana Scully. I am also a medical doctor. I’ll be doing the autopsy on the victim. I will also be going with you and Agent Mulder to the scene, if that’s okay with you.” 

“Well, you don’t say. Apologies, ma’am,” he looked embarrassed. 

Mulder spoke up. “It’s actually Doctor or Agent. She also re-wrote Einstein.” 

“Let’s go,” Scully snapped her proverbially whip. “The day is wasting away.” She would thank Mulder later for his comment. Right now she was trying not to hate the opposite gender. 

They all hopped in the rental. Scully took the back. She was afraid she might snap on the Sheriff. Mulder felt the same. He silently thought they might have another murder on their hands at the end of the day. He’d cover for her though. 

“Agent Mulder, you’re going to love the pier during this time.” 

“Why do you say that Sheriff,” Mulder wondered. 

“Well, it’s spring break,” Bishop said, as if it were obvious. “That means there are girls running around half naked. You are straight, aren’t you?”

“Yes”

“Five by five,” Scully mumbled in the back. 

“What was that Doc-Agent ummm Scully?” 

“Nothing, Bishop,” Scully responded. If he couldn’t give her a title, she wouldn’t dream of giving him one. 

They spent a total of 30 minutes at the crime scene. She took pictures. Mulder did his thing. The Sheriff creeped on young, innocent women. When Scully was done, she found Mulder and Sheriff Bishop looking towards a group of girls, with a smile on their faces. Mulder said something and the Sheriff nudged him with a chuckle. 

Scully announced she was ready to find a hotel. She was thoroughly annoyed. But she couldn’t say anything about it with the Sheriff around. Mulder wasn’t ever like this. What got into him. Was he really checking out these girls. She couldn’t believe him. Her blood pressure rose. 

The hotel was two miles from the beach. Perfect. But when they arrived, they only had one room. And it was because of a cancelation. It was the only hotel within a 30 mile radius that wasn’t booked. So they took it. The hotel manager looked giddy when he gave them the room keys. He conveniently forgot to mention the bed situation. 

“Great, bunk beds,” she grumbled. What did she do to deserve today? 

“Oh, wait. There’s a child sized bed over here too. Let’s move it closer and jump off the top bunk onto it.” 

She scoffed, not impressed. 

“It’ll be like a sleepover, Scully. It’ll be fun. Maybe later we can play spin the bottle,” he suggested. 

“You need more people for that, Mulder,” she gave attitude, rolling her eyes. 

“Maybe you do, but I don’t, Scully.” 

And any other day, she would’ve smiled and blushed. But not tonight. Tonight she was pissy. So she ignored him. 

“Whatever. Do you want top or bottom,” she quizzed, turning to take items out of her suit case. Scully always liked unpacking and making a home at her hotels. He just lived straight out of his bag. 

He grinned, thinking he had an opening to a joke. Think again, Mulder, she thought. 

“Well preferably I like-“

“Bunk, Mulder. Top or bottom bunk,” she snapped, not interested in his answer. No more jokes out of him tonight. She wasn’t to be messed with. Now his mood turned sour too. 

“Yesh. I was just playing around. No need to get bent out of shape.” 

“That’s the problem, Mulder. You’re always playing around. You can never be serious. I’m always the butt of all your jokes.” Were her eyes tearing up? No. She would not get overly emotional. 

“Now, come on. That’s not true, and you know it. What’s eating you? Is it your period?” He said that one time before, and she didn’t find it funny then. Why would he say it again, he asked himself. 

Note to self: do not ask Scully if she’s on her period. Don’t even mention it. 

“Wow,” she drew that one word out, constantly surprised he could be so stupid. She threw her cell phone charger on the desk. 

Mulder knew when a woman said that word, it was hardly ever a good thing. Actually there was a storm brewing, and he was afraid. The clueless male strikes again. He was spiraling out of control here. The only thing was that he had no idea how to stop. 

Scully was not someone you messed with. Physically, he could probably take her down. Maybe. She was a pretty damn good fighter. And he’d never lay a  
hand on her. But mentally, she was a lyrical ninja. Her words cut like a knife. 

“I’ll just take the top. It’ll be easier for you,” he said, trying to be considerate. But, of course, that was also the wrong thing to say. He just couldn’t win. 

“Why, because I am short!”

“No, actually. I was just trying to be nice. But yes, you are short. But your damn attitude is 6 foot 7. And I’ve had enough!” Also, the wrong thing to say. But he stopped caring fifteen minutes ago. 

“Should’ve tried being considerate at the pier,” she mumbled but he didn’t catch it, because he was also mumbling. 

“Women,” he mumbled back. If she wanted to mumble, he could mumble mean things too. Let the mumbling begin. 

“I’m going to take a bath. Choose whatever bed you like. I don’t care,” she huffed, grabbing her traveling bathroom kit. Of course she had a bathroom kit. She was too high maintenance to use the hotel stuff. Yet another silly thing he loved about her. 

When she got out of the bathroom, she found Mulder at the desk with the lamp on, reading over the case file. Obviously he couldn’t make a decision about the bed. Figures. 

“I am going to bed, Mulder. I’ll take this bed,” she gestured to the single, twin bed away from the bunk beds. “We can throw our luggage on the top bunk, if that suits you?” 

He sighed. He wasn’t going to argue anymore. It was hot. He was hungry. And he didn’t want to fight with her. 

“Scully, it’s nine o’clock on a Friday night, in California.” 

“So,” she shrugged. Clearly her bath had not washed away her resentment towards him. He still wasn’t sure what he did. Mulder was going to get to the bottom of it though. 

They’d shared rooms before and she was never this pissy. Something was amiss. 

“So, let’s get dressed, go get some sushi, and drink too much sake. Then we can tell ghost stories and maybe play truth or dare.” He was acting like one of those spring breakers. They were here for business not pleasure. 

“Unlike you, Mulder, I am here to solve this case. Maybe you and your buddy, Sheriff Bishop, can find some girls at the pier and get into some shenanigans together. Don’t call me for a ride back.” 

God damn her. He was over it. Fuck it. He was just going to ask what her malfunction was. 

“Alright, Scully. Lay it out for me. Because I’m confused. Last week we were kissing and inseparable. I thought we were moving in the right direction. Now you’re giving me the cold shoulder. Actually, not even the cold shoulder. You’re being hateful.” 

Scully scoffs. He really had no idea. She crossed her arms underneath her breasts, and looked him dead in the eye. Sometimes she forgot that he wasn’t a mind reader. He could read everyone else’s mind and predicts stranger’s next move, but not hers. She couldn’t decided how that made her feel. 

He pressed again. “Seriously, Scully. Just say it, because I’m done with this game.” 

“Game,” she mocked. She could show him a game. But it was already nine thirty, and to be honest, she was exhausted. Fighting with him was too much work, and it only ended in heart break and words you couldn’t take back. 

“Well,” he threw his hands up. “What else would you call this,” he pointed in a back and forth motion, between the two of them. “Something is wrong and I can’t fix it until I know what the hell I did or didn’t do.”

“Fine,” she stomped, uncrossing her arms. “You and Sheriff Bishop could’ve been more professional today. I was sick and tired of hearing how hot those spring break co-Ed’s were.” 

“So, you’re saying you’re jealous,” he quizzed. Her eyes grew wider, if possible. Her blue orbs were now a deep, dark blue. He could swim in those eyes, if he wasn’t so afraid she’d let him drown. 

“Actually, no. But thank you for thinking I’d be jealous of a teenager. I’m disappointed. I thought you’d be more professional.” 

And he just left it at that. There wasn’t anything to say. He didn’t ever say he thought any of those girls were hot. All he did was nod his head and agree with the sheriff. He made one comment about what he did when he was a spring breaker, back in the day. What else was he supposed to do? Should he have told the Sheriff that Scully was the only woman he found hot? That would’ve went as well as giving a cat a bath. Scully would’ve lost her damn mind. 

“Okay. Are you hungry,” he asked, searching for the take out menus. He really was hungry for some sushi. He was going to order whether she was hungry or not. If she wanted to sulk, so be it. Eventually she’d get over it. 

“What!” She was pissed he didn’t want to continue on with this fight. 

“I asked if you were hungry. We haven’t eaten all day, Scully.” He was so cool and collected. She could’ve slapped him. “We got to the bottom of the situation. Do you want to continue with this argument?”

She crossed her arms and huffed. In Scully’s eyes, it wasn’t resolved. She was still hurt. So, no. She was not done arguing. She briefly wondered if that was childish of her.

“Look, Scully. Yes, I agreed with the Sheriff about women in bikinis. I didn’t say I was going to get their number, nor did I say I was interested,” he pointed out and she relaxed her posture. He was right, of course. “And I certainly do not want to spend the rest of my life with any of them.”

How could she even be mad at him after he made a statement like that?  
Especially after she has been a royal bitch all night. 

She made that adorable crinkle in her forehead, afraid to jump to any conclusions. So he did it for her.

Placing a finger over her lips, he made a confession. The kind of confession that could ruin everything. 

“I’m not on the market, Scully, and neither are you. Okay?” 

She kissed the finger he had laid on her lips and she placed her forehead on his chest. She was feeling ashamed of herself. Maybe her period was coming, she laughed to herself. He kissed the top of her head. 

“I’m sorry if today upset you. I wasn’t thinking. But you’re the only woman I give a shit about and want to see in a bikini. You do own a teeny, tiny bikini, don’t you, Scully? Even if you don’t, just lie to me.”

She looked up at him and smiled like the Cheshire Cat. 

“I’m an old man. Those were just teenage girls. That Sheriff should be ashamed of himself.” 

She agreed with him, with a nod of her head. The argument was now over and it felt resolved.

“Mulder, I am sorry for being ridiculous. I don’t know what got into me,” Scully apologized. And she was sorry too. 

“Ehhh. We all go a little crazy sometimes. Maybe you’re just hungry. And I’m a pain in the ass. You’re really a saint for putting up with me.”

“I’m afraid I am not much better, Mulder. I didn’t treat you very fairly tonight.” 

“That’s okay. I forgive you. You’re cute when you’re angry.” 

She gave him a shove but was laughing. “Order that food, funny guy. I’m starving.” She went into the bathroom to unclip her hair from her bath, and comb it out. 

“Hey, Scully. You want some sake too?”

“Yes, please,” she hollered back. Scully loves a good sake with her sushi. And maybe, if he was lucky, he could get her to play some truth or dare. 

She came out of the bathroom looking more like the Scully who kicks ass and talks trash. With her hair up, she looked like a college student studying for her exams. 

“Alright, did we decide on the bed situation,” she asked. Because it did need to be cleared up before they started drinking. 

“We could always share this bed,” he gestured to the single bed. He was very hopeful. You could see it in his smile. 

“Can you keep your hands to yourself,” she wondered. 

“Probably not, Scully,” he admitted. But it made her heart happy. If he had said yes, she’d be heart broken. 

“Than you should decided if you want the top or bottom.”

“Oooh, top or bottom what?”

“Mulder, get your mind out of the gutter.” 

“That’s fine, Scully. Continue being aloof. I like it. I’ll just ask you again, when we play truth or dare.” 

Her eye brows raised. She knew after a couple shots of sake, she’d play truth or dare with him. She better eat a bunch of food to soak up the alcohol. It wouldn’t due to get drunk too quickly. 

“If we play truth or dare, Mulder.” There was a small chance she wasn’t going to indulge him. 

“If is good. I’ll take that.” 

THE END  
RED


End file.
